Omokhuwa

🎶🎵 Great is thy faithfulness, O God my father. There is no shadow of turning with thee, Thou changest not, thy compassion they fail not, As thou hast been, thou forever will be. 🎶🎵 Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart And do not rely on your own insight or understanding . In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him , And He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way]. Proverbs 3:5‭-‬6 AMP It's the end of the first half of the year and the beginning of the second. There might have been a lot of things you wish to have been started on by this time of the year, goals you had set in place but nothing has gone the way you planned, I am inviting you on a journey of trust for the second half of the year. Do not laze around, be diligent but trust in the Lord, lay it all down at His feet this new second half of the year. Trust in Him. 🎶🎵 If He dresses the lilies with beauty and splendor How much more will...

Now it seems we have come to the end of the series detailing how my 2021 went, it is important to note that inasmuch as I mentioned some things, I didn't mention others and as a result, I can do so in subsequent writeups. At some point, I wanted to stop... around March or April, things were beginning to get serious and I don't appreciate people all in my business, what was the point? I asked Jesus, why should I continue? This makes no sense... By May, I was considering cutting it short and continuing at a much later time(which might never come) but God confirmed that He was the one who asked me to do so. Why am I saying all this? I did not write all the things I wrote just for the fun of it, just because I love telling people about me, that was not the intent, I wrote it because He asked me to so I hope that even more than my words could convey, you were able to get the message He wanted to pass across to you, my experiences are peculiar to me just like yours are to...

I realised I was still hurting and had not healed after Jesus hugged me but didn't really go about healing and was still in the process of figuring it out. I began getting triggered easily and an event happened this month that me realise I really needed to deal, it brought a lot of things to light. Again, I wanted to be away from everyone, I just wanted to recline to a lonely island for sometime and be without anyone so I won't be anything to anyone. Not a friend, sister, mentee, or just about anything else bit I couldn't do that. I didn't own a fancy yacht anywhere and an airplane to come cart me off. 🙃😹 I remember getting on a call with my eldest sister, Etseoghena, during this period and she said something that struck a cord in me. She said: " We are spiritual beings going through natural occurrences", n ow, she was trying to use this to explain some things she was saying earlier about how it is important to ensure we do not stay down and that line, that ...

Now in school, I was trying to work on myself, to grow and be better, not really deal with how I was feeling but just be better however... How do I explain this? My school has a very different atmosphere and when I came here at first, I didn't feel it because I wasn't 'open' to the school, now I did. The week following the week I resumed, I resumed Oct 30, 2021 so 31st Oct- 6th Nov, 2021, something happened... I went to Chapel as usual on the 31st because it was a Sunday however, during the service, someone played the saxophone and I remember almost tearing up because it was bringing up memories but I didn't, it is almost important to keep one's cool in church, sadly(this is not supposed to be the narrative.) I began to feel choked, I was really spiralling out of control this week, I just wanted to do something, anything to take my mind off things but I couldn't really do anything. I was restless. I wanted to study but I couldn't. I would read books but ...

Inasmuch as I was down and still not well, I could not do anything about it. I felt like taking timeout but I could not really do that. Everyone was home and school had resumed. My mum has a school, the responsibility was placed on my elder sister now because she was there with her then. For the longest time, I began to blame myself for my mum and jace's death, I felt it was all my fault because I really wanted to see them, I was not able to at the end, I also wasn't sure I was happy I didn't die in my hometown, I mean, maybe I was supposed to because I wanted to see them so desperately coming back from school so death would seal it, it wouldn't have made sense to have lost my life though too because we went to Edo, my hometown, to bury my mother, why end up burying two people? Also, how will my family cope? A lot of thoughts were coming to mind, reasoning and all. Lateron, I got to understand it didn't make sense blaming myself through God and a friend of mine. At ...

I had just finished writing a major paper: my second to the last examination paper, gotten my mum a book by T.D Jakes which I knew she would enjoy when I received this.  I had just gotten her a book I knew she would really like and then this? This message comes in?  I was amazed, she couldn't possibly be serious; I tried to play it cool at first... incase it was true so it wouldn't look like I was uninformed.  You see, this person was from the church I used attend at home and at times, they call me Peace because that is my name. I then proceeded to call my mum thereafter and I got no reply on her end, later, I called my dad and he said she wasn't around now, I found it strange because it was late in the evening and if she was going anywhere, she would go with him or he would mention where she went to.  Still on the search for answers, I called my elder brother and asked him if my mom was preparing for school because she loved school so much, h...

This month was a month of just utter brokenness, It was a month of acceptance, trust and just reliance on God.  I still had my moods from time to time, it was more of a rinse and repeat season. A part of a song named Still Holy by Maverick City and Tribl, that got me this month was:  🎵🎶"He's in the fire And the flames He's not done working so don't loose faith Don't you stop praising Just lift his name higher higher"🎶🎵 I was learning, relearning, letting go and preparing for exams.  I spoke to my mum a few times this month with the 26th being the last time I would speak to her, I didn't know that at the time though but I had plans, plans of what I was going to do upon getting home which included talking to her to find out certain things. It had been awhile. I hadn't been home since February 22, I had questions and I was going to get answers or so I thought little did I know what was waiting for me around at home. ~ Omokhuwa.

A flat-twist I was popularly known for last year. 👇      Picture taken on the 4th of July after I had just                              finished crying. I placed this picture as my whatsapp display picture for quite sometime but a lot of people did not know the story behind it. On that day, that Sunday, I had just gotten back from church and I was tired, I walked to an isolated area where the only noise around was that of men working and I did not care that I was being reckless, I had to get some relief by crying. This month was my birth month and my birth anniversary was nothing to write home about... it was on a saturday, I went for basketball practice(this was my last, I could not afford it), and after returning... I stayed indoors and cried almost all through the day. It was quite eventful; That's not to say I didn't have friends and family who didn't celebrate me, I did... I just ...

June!!          Me on my way to the basketball field for                         training on Sunday. This month will be incomplete without me mentioning some key persons who played a role in what happened this month; my friends, Daniel and Gift then Kelvin. Daniel took me on a journey of openness, with God and with people, he opened me up to an understanding of a new kind of relationship with God. Gift was a shoulder and a person who understood me. Kelvin was someone who taught me on several things both directly and indirectly.  I began learning basketball this month with my friend, Gift. I should mention that I didn't think Gift and I would remain friends for a long time,I was just going with the flow however and what God said. I was quite popular for beating myself up and this month, I did it a whole lot more, certain things didn't seem to be going well, God had given me certain ...

                          A picture I took😇 I had a huge crush on nature and was still out for trying new things and decided to enroll in a free class/training despite the fact that I had first semester exams in the beginning of the month... I was asked to write my obituary and a number of other things in this month which I did before I dropped out of the class/training.  It was helpful and would have been helpful in the long run, it just was not helping me with my academics. I began moving with some persons this year during the exam period, it was quite something and on the last day of the exam, I met someone in Chapel who would later be a huge help in this season of my life. I was very active online, on WhatsApp and twitter, I was active in certain groups and posted on my whatsapp status from time to time writing as led, just teachings. I began a reading bible challenge because I wanted to be consistent...

I matriculated this month and because I could not afford to make my hair, styled my hair myself in the morning before leaving, my mum really wanted to come for my matriculation but somehow fell sick so my elder ones came instead.  Matriculation connotes something of joy to people but I wasn't really happy, I felt shame and at the same time, I did not post anything because I wanted to keep my life private however, I posted a picture due to my hair, I wanted people to see the beauty but unfortunately, I had not taken any picture without the cap and gown for my hair. The picture I posted👇 This is a spillover for you. 🥰 Despite all this, this was a very depressing month for me, I was going through a lot of things and not talking to anyone about it, it messed up with me a lot, and at times, messed up with my relationship with people. I was reading something into what was not. I had days where I would cry endlessly and it always transited into other ...

My roommates were in 300 level and knew some other people so they helped me get some people in my department and one would think I would be wiser this time and wait to complete my registration before I start attending classes but I wasn't. They along with others advised me to start attending classes with 200 level physiotherapy students due to the amount of things they had covered and I did. My department and I still had issues unresolved, my result was not good enough for the department so I was referred to Anatomy or physiology, my elder sister said it was a bad idea(no offence to those in that department) so I didn’t go there, I was preparing to leave Redeemers University again, I was ready to.  On a fateful day, I prayed God would help me like the school because through Apostle Joshua Selman, I knew and understood the principle of honour: what you don't honour, you cannot be blessed by and asked God to speak to me and I didn't expect him to do so directly, just indirec...

I had mixed feelings about being in LMU, people would see me as my brother's sister, those who were keen on the information and I would just be Elisha's sister, in a sense to them. A good name makes way, yes but we went to the same secondary school as well.  I had some assignments God had given to me before now as well which was to be online, I had also started a #learndailychallenge on twitter and without a gadget, it seemed I would not be able to do them till much later, I did not mind not having a phone, I just did not know how things will work out.                                         *** Although it was a time of bliss for the two weeks I stayed, I was in pain at certain periods of time in that first week and when I felt overwhelmed, I either laid on my bed and cried or went to the bathroom. I was tired, this was the second university I would be in. The next week, I went to t...

By now I had said my goodbyes to Distinguished Teenagers through Instagram{(now known as Distinguished Family), an online family I met in the year 2020, it transcended the online platform though} where I was a leader because it was necessary.  My phone was stolen in the previous month after a church program, Landmark University did not allow phones so there was no biggie about that and no need to get a new phone, I took my elder sister's old phone though in order to be able to communicate on my way to Landmark university, omu-aran, Kwara State. I arrived to the school on the 2nd of February, 2021 and luckily for me, had someone there to welcome me, The Chairman of the student Council 2020/2021,  Ed Emmanuel courtesy of my elder brother, Elisha Oreunomhe who was the Vice chairman of Student Council 2019/2020 set. I was taken to the medical center with the car(the Student Council body had their car, a jeep, I think) where I was cleared for entrance into the hostel. I gave my pho...

I am home now, what will I do with my life? Please you have to understand, I had just been involved in certain unfortunate circumstances. What will I do? My parents were fretting already. What school will I attend? Will I have to go to a private school afterall despite everything, despite all the money spent? I was lost, sad and at the same time nonchalant. Sad due to peer pressure mostly and everyone likes to succeed, nonchalant because I had no passion for these things or actual directions on why I needed to go to a place or where I needed to go. At this time of the year, I was teaching in my parents school, I really wanted to know what I would do though, I wanted direction but I did not care enough. I knew what I wanted as well but I wasn't heard. Sometime in the month, My brother and I visited a university called Bells University, it was terrible. I did not like it, the colours were tacky, they were using louvers that were broken and what's even more, the security stopped u...

 It was a new environment, I did not think it was going to last for a long time because I did not buy into it, I did not like it, I was just coming from another environment which I really fancied and due to a mistake I made, I had to switch schools. I could not believe it. Again, I did not think I was going to stay there for long, but I tried to do what I could little did I know that I would be staying for quite sometime and what's more? This environment would shake up a lot of things for me. I am someone who prides myself on being strong, I was once weak and was insulted, used for it so I hardened myself and moved with that for a period of time. I learnt to smile even when I didn't feel like it, I learnt all the more how to bottle up how I felt and always turned to my book to pen down how I felt from time to time in form of poetry. I was not going to allow anyone to break me and seeing how I was not someone who was given to tears anymore, I did not have an issue but that all c...

Do you believe in Jesus? Do you believe in the word of God? If yes, why do you believe? If no, why do you not believe? What are the claims of your belief? What is that which you can stand on when you say you believe?  I read a book by Trey Gowdy with the title: "Doesn't hurt to ask" in 2020; The main theme of the book spoke about questioning your beliefs. It spoke about knowing why you believe what you say you believe and being able to defend that belief whatever comes.  Paul says to be ready to defend your belief in Christ as well.  "But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear. I Peter 3:15" Why do you believe in what you say you do? Can you explain it to the layman? How prepared are you for the days ahead when you will have to defend your christian faith or lack of one? What will you then claim to be the reason?  When you say the spiritual ...

 " I just had feelings, still have feelings and what I realize is that, There is a place of feelings where you can honour the Lord"                 ~ Chandler Moore, from his album, Feelings. Currently, I feel unstable, I feel numb, in a sense but at peace. I feel sensitive, but desensitised. I feel unready for a lot of things but unconcerned. I feel like doing something risky but I will not due to logic. I feel an headache coming up and as though I might be slow for the rest of the day. I feel overwhelmed but underwhelmed. I feel smart but unwise. I feel the joy of the Lord strengthening me but unsure. I feel like journalling but I do not have the words to write. I feel like talking to God but I do not have the words or rather, I feel I should have nothing to say to Him.  I feel selfish for thinking about me but happy I am, in a sense. I feel overwhelmed by God’s mighty hand of protection, of love but I wonder why at times. I feel sad I...

  It's Day 3 of the challenge now, I am about 2 days late. I miss not being active on social media anymore, I miss not being so interactive like I was two years ago, I understand that life comes with seasons and I am happy for the season I am in now but at times, I miss the me of then. Lately, I have found myself missing things and people from years back, I have found myself being recalling things that happened years ago fondly, I have found myself nostalgic and at times, sad. I miss the Jollof rice and Egg I was given on Wednesdays in secondary school. I miss the food the canteen woman sells, it always tasted so nice back then. I miss the innocence of the child I was at Junior secondary school. I miss the beans and rice we were given in Junior school on fridays. I miss always running away from cutting grass, I miss being responsible for the rake and handling it over to those cutting grass. I miss feigning innocence at times so I was thought ignorant and kept from doing some things...

 Hmmn... what are 10 habits I find strange? I have delayed in writing this for so long now because I honestly have not been able to come up with "2 habits I find strange not to talk of ten" so instead I will write on 10 habits I find intriguing, ten that interests me. 1) Watching movies all day; I find this particularly interesting because movies are usually temporary replacements for me, they work as distractions or help in de-stressing. So when I see someone who watches movies daily for a long period of time, I am usually intrigued about the why and the what?  2) Waking up at a specific time; especially when one sleeps like late, for example; sleeping by 4am due to certain things one needs to cover and still waking up by 5am when one has the liberty to stay in bed longer. 3) Expressiveness; I personally can be an expressive person at times so it intrigues me when I see one who is as expressive as I am, who is not shy to let oneself go and still yet, maintain one's digni...

  Happy New Month!  Hello here, It's a new month and well, I am in a creative group. On this group, we decided to go on a 21 days writing challenge so just stay tuned for a daily writeup from me. Today, I am to write on my daily activities which I will not be writing them in any particular order. • Say my prayer, give thanks. • Read my devotional; I have a devotional on my phone and make use of it every morning when I wake up. I also go over a daily verse to memorise using YouVersion Bible app, I haven't really been memorizing all. • Read a chapter from "Book of Mysteries" by Jonathan Cahn and think on it throughout the day. • Freshen up. • Attend classes on school days. • Read a book in between, perhaps break time; I have not really been able to read books due to the busy schedule here in school. • Read my school books; I try to read what was taught before lectures the next day so I am not lost, it has been working out well for some courses. • Eat. • Listen to music ...